Relationships

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We are all at the centre of a big network of relationships; with family, friends, acquaintances, teachers, pets, partners and all sorts of other people.

When they are healthy, these relationships help us to thrive. As well as helping us enjoy the good times, they see us through the bad times too, holding us like a safety net when we’re at risk of falling.

What all good relationships have in common is that they are based on respect, trust, and communication. That’s true whether it’s your relationship with your best friend, your teacher or your partner.

Most people have more than one romantic relationship during their life. Going out with different people helps you find out who you are compatible with and what you want from a relationship.

It’s also fine not to be in a relationship at all. Lots of people are single and many are single by choice. They aren’t interested in love or romance, and that’s totally fine.

The most important thing, if you do choose to be in a relationship with someone, is that it should be a positive experience. It won’t be perfect every day – all relationships go through ups and downs -but it should be fun and help you feel good about yourself.

Brook and Enduring Love?

Enduring Love? was a two year Open University research study which interviewed over 5,000 couples in long-term relationships. The researchers asked the couples about various aspects of their relationships and what made them endure and the results were fascinating.

Brook teamed up with Professor Jacqui Gabb, who headed up the study, to create the relationships section of the Brook site covering all aspects of relationships, based on the findings of the research.

This section aims to give advice and information that is based in reality. It is based on what real couples said – rather than the myths and stereotypes we are bombarded with through stories, films and songs about love and romance.

It’s true that relationships often start out with romance. You feel an amazing sense of togetherness, and the differences between you don’t seem to matter. Everything is perfect – it feels quite magical and ‘unreal’ – and in a way it is.

But for a relationship to last and endure, most couples will need to move from this magical place into a phase where their relationship can survive the reality of everyday life – and the reality of each other.

 

The Open University

About Enduring Love?
Professor Jacqui Gabb of the Open University, talks about the Enduring Love? research project and summarises what it uncovered.

Relationship myths
Relationships rely on flowers, chocolates, never arguing and having endless sex, right? WRONG! Read the top 8 myths busted by the Enduring Love? research project.

Looking for a relationship
From being happy in yourself, to taking the plunge if you meet someone; here’s our advice if you’re looking for a relationship.

Kindness
Research shows that the key to lasting relationships was less about grand gestures and more about everyday acts of kindness.

Communication
The Enduring Love? research project showed that communication can make or break a relationship. Read more about it here.

The truth about sex & intimacy
We’re surrounded by messages that tell us that sex is essential for a successful relationship. The Enduring Love? research showed this simply wasn’t the case.

Breaking up
Breaking up with someone is rarely easy but breakups are an inevitable part of relationships. Read our advice for dealing with them.

Arguments: what causes them?
Relationship experts say it’s impossible to be close to someone without arguing. Learn more about what causes them.

Dealing better with arguments
Experts on relationships say it’s impossible to be close to someone without sometimes arguing. But if its getting you down, here is some advice on dealing better with arguments.

Is arguing with your partner always a bad thing?
Here’s some advice from Relate, the UK’s largest provider of relationship counselling services.

Spending time together…and apart
It’s a myth that spending every moment together is key to a strong relationship. The Enduring Love? research showed time apart is as important.

Trust and jealousy
Trust creates a strong bond between people. Jealousy undermines trust and can drive people apart. Read more about each emotion, here.

I’ve been cheated on
It’s hard to say what cheating is, as it’s different for so many people. Read our guide to discussing it and dealing with it.

I’ve cheated
Cheating on someone you care about is a hurtful thing to do. But the reasons why it happens can be complicated.

Non-monogamous relationships
Learn more about non-monogamy which means having more than one partner, or having sex with other people as well.

Sex: what if you want different things?
When it comes to sex, what we want and enjoy can change over the course of a relationship and leave you out of sync. Read more about how to navigate this.

Recognising an abusive relationship: Sophie’s story
Sophie, 25, shares her experiences of being in an abusive relationship with her piece on ‘8 things I wish I’d known’.

Social media and relationships
Brook guest blogger Sophie, 25, muses on the topic of social media and whether it makes relationships easier or harder.

Things you only learn when you start a new relationship
Brook guest blogger Sophie, 25, shares her thoughts on starting a new relationship; the high, the lows and the meeting-of-the-family.

Abuse in relationships
Read about the signs that tell you you are in an abusive relationship.

Love: is it really all about putting someone else before you?
Our guest blogger Sophie, 25, shares her thoughts on love and what it really means to put someone else first.

Sex, relationships and your rights
Read about your rights and responsibilities when it comes to relationships and sex.
This article is by courtesy of Brook

How to Be Naughty and Sexy – Spice Up Your Love Life

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44 Amazing Sex Positions Every Married Couple Should Try To Spice Up Their Sex Life
Like many aspects of marriage, sex plays an integral part in the relationship. It goes beyond physical actions and acts as a form of communication and connection. An unhappy sex life can quickly lead to an unhappy marriage. One of the easiest and most pleasurable ways to keep your sex life active, exciting, and – most importantly – spicy is to keep things new. This can be done through various forms of foreplay, open communication about likes and dislikes, and a willingness to explore new positions. To help you explore your sex life and keep things spicy in (and out!) of the bedroom, this book offers a guide to 44 sexual positions ranging from the extremely intimate to adventurous and athletic.
Here is a list of types of positions you’ll learn in the book:
Intimacy Positions: For Those Needing to Rekindle Their Fire
Lying Down Positions: Finding New Ways to Make Horizontal Fun Memorable
Sitting and Kneeling Positions: You Don’t Have to Lie Down and Take It
Standing Positions: Who Said Sex Stays in the Bedroom?
Adventurous and Athletic Positions: For Those in Need of a Challenge
Your sex life may be suffering for a number of reasons – lack of intimacy, lack of variety, etc. – or it may be bountiful and just in need of a few ideas to jumpstart the bedroom adventures. Whatever the reason, these tips should offer the spice needed to kick start your love life to a whole new level.

10 ways to spice up your love life

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***Reinvigorate your sex life – Purchase this book today!***
Do you and your partner have the same boring sex over and over again? Do you have trouble achieving satisfaction? Do you wish you could recapture the zest your sex life had long ago? When you purchase Sex: The Ultimate Sex Guide That Will Spice Up Your Sex Life – 2nd Edition, your relationship can improve overnight! These fun and easy tips can transform your sexual routine into an exciting, rewarding experience. You’ll be proud to tell other couples that you and your partner are “very close”. Would you like to try something new? Do you want to achieve more stimulation? Do you need to address any problems in your sex life? Sex: The Ultimate Sex Guide That Will Spice Up Your Sex Life – 2nd Edition teaches you how men and women achieve climaxes. You’ll also learn how to change positions, try new ones, and create more friction. You’ll even learn how to cope with common problems couples have in the bedroom. Would you like to explore more with your partner? Do you want to try something different and new? Would you like to know what you can buy to enhance your mutual pleasure? This book helps you understand both male and female fantasies. You can even spice things up with some adult toys! Purchase Sex: The Ultimate Sex Guide That Will Spice Up Your Sex Life – 2nd Edition now and start enriching your most intimate relationship!

Spice Up Your Sex Life + Kegel Toys |Let’s Talk About Sex|

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Enjoy a Happier, Healthier, and More Satisfying Sex Life!
***Reinvigorate your sex life – Purchase this book today!***
Do you and your partner have the same boring sex over and over again? Do you have trouble achieving satisfaction? Do you wish you could recapture the zest your sex life had long ago? When you purchase Sex: The Ultimate Sex Guide That Will Spice Up Your Sex Life – 2nd Edition, your relationship can improve overnight! These fun and easy tips can transform your sexual routine into an exciting, rewarding experience. You’ll be proud to tell other couples that you and your partner are “very close”. Would you like to try something new? Do you want to achieve more stimulation? Do you need to address any problems in your sex life? Sex: The Ultimate Sex Guide That Will Spice Up Your Sex Life – 2nd Edition teaches you how men and women achieve climaxes. You’ll also learn how to change positions, try new ones, and create more friction. You’ll even learn how to cope with common problems couples have in the bedroom. Would you like to explore more with your partner? Do you want to try something different and new? Would you like to know what you can buy to enhance your mutual pleasure? This book helps you understand both male and female fantasies. You can even spice things up with some adult toys! Purchase Sex: The Ultimate Sex Guide That Will Spice Up Your Sex Life – 2nd Edition now and start enriching your most intimate relationship!

Spice Up Your Sex Life + Kegel Toys |Let’s Talk About Sex|

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The New York Times No.1 bestselling sex book from America’s No.1 sex and romance author

This is the book that got more than a million couples back in the bedroom, with rekindled passion, hot romance, and a whole bunch of new techniques. There are 50 Secret Seductions written for his eyes only and 50 for her including the steamy ‘Dangerous When Wet’ and the saucy ‘Wild Card’…seduction number 101? That’s for both of you. Save that one for last – it’s for experienced lovers only!

Now in a different format with brand new seductions especially for the UK market, this book guarantees ‘great sex twice a week, every week, for one full year!’ and all it takes is the commitment to play and GRRREAT SEX does the rest – from foolproof seduction tips to a list of ingredients (scarf, massage oil etc). What’s more, you’ll actually turn interesting, exhilarating, unpredictable sex into a habit, and not just a special event. This is the classic book that’s sold over a million copies; America’s bestselling sex book. What’s all the buzz about? Find out when you buy 101 NIGHTS OF GRRREAT SEX!

FailArmy’s Top Fails Breakdown || How To Spice Up Your Love Life

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This is the book that got more than a million couples back in the bedroom, with rekindled passion, hot romance, and a whole bunch of new techniques. There are 50 Secret Seductions written for his eyes only and 50 for her including the steamy ‘Dangerous When Wet’ and the saucy ‘Wild Card’…seduction number 101? That’s for both of you. Save that one for last – it’s for experienced lovers only!

Now in a different format with brand new seductions especially for the UK market, this book guarantees ‘great sex twice a week, every week, for one full year!’ and all it takes is the commitment to play and GRRREAT SEX does the rest – from foolproof seduction tips to a list of ingredients (scarf, massage oil etc). What’s more, you’ll actually turn interesting, exhilarating, unpredictable sex into a habit, and not just a special event. This is the classic book that’s sold over a million copies; America’s bestselling sex book. What’s all the buzz about? Find out when you buy 101 NIGHTS OF GRRREAT SEX!

Five ways to please your woman

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Five ways to please a woman in bed

Siski Green / 18 February 2016

Unsure what women want in bed? Find out five unique ways to give a woman a great orgasmic experience during sex.

Couple in bed
Read our tips for a more fulfilling and satisfying sex life

While each woman will enjoy sex in a different way there are some things guaranteed to give the woman you’re in bed with a great sexual experience.

Avoid her genitals

That may sound like bizarre advice but all too often men zone in on the genital region way too early.

You may hear a woman sing the sexual praises of a man who can pinpoint her clitoris with the tip of his tongue or one who just how to thrust but that won’t be the same for every woman – one thing that will be the same for every woman is that she’d love it if you spent time exploring her body fully, kissing, licking and touching everywhere, so that she is fully aroused when you finally target her vulva and clitoris.

Read our tips for having better sex.

Use your voice

Communicating your pleasure while you’re having sex, as well as a sexy, ‘Does that feel good?” or “Do you like that?” will do wonders for her sex experience. It not only gives her a good idea of what moves do it for you (which in itself enhances her own sex experience), it also means she has a way of letting you know when she really loves something you’re doing, or when it’s not really doing it for her.

Don’t be shy when it comes to showering her with compliments as you’re getting down to sex too – her breasts, the scent on her neck, her skin, her lips, her thighs, her waist, the feel of her vagina on your penis and so on. The more confident she feels when naked in bed with you, the sexier she’ll feel… which leads to more pleasure for both of you.

Read our tips for increasing your libido.

Indulge her

One of the main reasons women fail to reach orgasm during sex is because they feel ‘guilty’ for taking too long or for requiring so much effort. So rather than relax and let you take them to orgasm, they stress about taking too long and as a result don’t get to climax at all!

So make it easy for her by giving her no choice but to relax and enjoy it. Tell her that tonight is her night – you won’t orgasm or try to – you will simply spend your time exploring and stimulating her. Give her a full body massage to relax her physically and mentally first, then really take your time exploring her body and finding out what she enjoys most.

Once the pressure to hurry up is off, she may find it easier and quicker to reach orgasm.

Find out about women, ageing and sex – how it changes.

Try this handy position

Most women find it difficult to orgasm during penetrative sex but there’s a way around that – use your hands.

When you’re on top, slide your hand down between you (you’ll need to rest your bodyweight on your other elbow or arm, and angle yourself slightly to one side) and rub her clitoris as you thrust. As the clitoris is above the vaginal opening it sometimes doesn’t get directly stimulated during penetration and your hand can help fix that problem.

This is a great way to aim for a simultaneous orgasm too, which will make for a truly memorable experience.

Read our guide to getting started with sex toys.

Use some lube

While not all women will have problems with dryness, many do and even those that don’t – women in their 20s for example – will enjoy sex far more with lubrication.

Silicone-based lubricants make everything feel more sensuous because what might be uncomfortable rubbing is transformed into deliciously sexy sliding with a simple squeeze of a tube or bottle. Use it on her breasts first (see above regarding avoiding her genitals), and then on her genitals and yours.

– See more at: http://www.saga.co.uk/magazine/relationships/love-sex/5-ways-to-please-a-woman-in-bed#sthash.4A5TCeD4.dpuf

Sex therapists’ secrets to better sex

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Siski Green / 19 April 2016

If you’d like to enjoy sex more then get the inside scoop on what the sex experts recommend you do to enjoy a truly sizzling sex life.

Mature couple with good sex life
Find out what the experts recommend you do to improve your sex life

Why is it that we’re perfectly willing to ask for advice about our diet, exercise and health, and yet when it comes to sex, we expect to know it all without even trying? Well, the truth is that there is always more to learn about sex – and you can have lots of fun during the learning process, too!

There are, however, differences in the kinds of obstacles to hot sex you’re facing now, in your fifties and beyond, to the ones you faced as a younger adult. Which is why it’s so important to look at those obstacles and figure out ways to overcome them. Once you’ve done that, you’ll enjoy a healthy and exciting sex life again.

Related: sex over 60, what no one will tell you

For the over 50s, the most common complaints from women relate not to physical issues but psychological ones, while for men, it’s a mix of the two. “There are a couple of key things women in their 50s tell me that trouble them,” says sex and relationship expert Dr Pam Spurr (online @drpamspurr and drpam.co.uk). “Lack of desire and bedroom boredom. And for men, boredom is also often mentioned, as well as concern over performance.”

Related: enjoying sex with erectile dysfunction

Boost desire

Take a look at your relationship and figure out when desire started to fade. Pinpointing that can be extremely fruitful. Most often it isn’t one event or experience, but a slow change relating to other parts of life. Perhaps your partner doesn’t help at home as much as you’d like, or you’ve both been too busy to spend time together.

“What’s crucial if you lack desire is to start prioritising time for you and your partner,” says Spurr. “Our 24/7 lifestyles mean we’re pulled in far too many directions. If you don’t make time for yourself, and as a couple, you simply won’t feel desire.”

“Getting very practical about this works,” continues Spurr. “Make sure your partner helps you with household chores and if you struggle with anxiety/depression/stress start sorting this out day by day. Then carve out a candlelit evening for the two of you. Desire will come back.”

Related: 7 ways to increase your libido

Fine-tuning your bedroom performance

Physically, sex can be different when you’re older – as a woman, you might find you don’t produce as much lubrication naturally as you used to; for a man, it can mean having trouble maintaining an erection. And that can seem like a huge problem.

“For a man the other side of 50 concerns about performance in bed can be just as nerve-wracking as for a younger man – but while a younger man usually worries about orgasming too soon, an older man may worry about maintaining an erection and possibly not reaching orgasm at all,” says Dr Ian Kerner, sex counsellor and author of She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman. “Worry is the enemy here, so banish it by taking all focus off your penis. Instead, use your fingers, your lips and tongue, a sex toy – enjoy giving her pleasure and you’ll likely find that over time your worries abate. Less anxiety will make it easier to maintain an erection but importantly you’ll have figured out that an erection isn’t essential for great sex.”

Related: men, ageing and sex

Beat boredom

Both men and women often report boredom as being a problem in their sex lives – once the passion of the first few years has passed, it can be difficult to find the energy or excitement to make sex different each time.

But boredom in the bedroom isn’t an inevitable part of a long-term relationship – many couples enjoy a great sex life for decades. Their secret? Trust and honesty. “Tackle boredom by finally being honest about your secret desires,” says Spurr. “Ninety-two percent of women admit to having sexual fantasies and opening up to your partner about them can be really hot for both of you. Don’t be shy, whisper how you’ve always fantasised about, e.g., him being a handsome stranger who approaches you on the beach. He offers to massage you but then goes further with his caresses.”

Being up front like this can change his world too – because not only will he see you in a new light and be able to satisfy needs of yours he might not have been aware of, it’ll also allow him to be more open with you. “Honesty at this time your life can really turn things around. You might find he has some surprising fantasies to share with you too.”

– See more at: http://www.saga.co.uk/magazine/relationships/love-sex/sex-therapists-tips-for-better-sex?utm_source=newsletter-apr22&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Magazine%20Newsletter#sthash.4f5a18Hd.dpuf

Why sex in your 40s is BETTER than in your 20s

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Sex expert Samantha Evans writes sexual health articles for Healthista
The former nurse now runs a sex toy website with her husband
Says she was clueless about sex in her 20s but it’s now ‘better than ever’
Believes sex gets better with age and says various products can spice it up
By SAMANTHA EVANS FOR HEALTHISTA

1B5E046800000578-0-image-m-23_145800455132832F7C0D300000578-3529802-image-a-23_1460116367125
I’m 47 and I love sex!
I’m happily married with three children, two of whom are teenagers, and I write sexual health and pleasure articles.
Here, I want to share my thoughts on why I’m having better sex now than when I was in my 20s.
This is to dispel the common view that by the time you hit your 40s, your sex life will be non existent.
At the age of 20 I was clueless about sex, men and my body. Now, I’m a mature woman who loves sex and knows what she wants.
I get fed up reading negative articles about being premenopausal, something which I am.
Former nurse and sex expert Samantha Evans, 47, says her sex life got better with age (file photo). ‘It got me thinking about what makes sex so much better for me and my husband now we’re in our late 40s’
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Former nurse and sex expert Samantha Evans, 47, says her sex life got better with age (file photo). ‘It got me thinking about what makes sex so much better for me and my husband now we’re in our late 40s’
There are so many things you can do to have a better sex life but, for many women, they either haven’t experienced good sex or just don’t like it and, rather than exploring way in which to overcome any sexual problems they may have, they give up.
I know that many women who do enjoy sex experience a wide range of sexual problems from decreased libido to vaginal dryness – myself included – but there are things you can do to overcome these symptoms.
Thinking back to my childhood, my sex education was very limited.

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How many people have YOU indirectly slept with? Take this…

Father who had half his penis amputated to remove cancer…

Do YOU struggle to orgasm? For men the key to climax lies in…

Teenager who gave birth on the loo had NO idea she was…

I had a couple of boyfriends and a few one night stands but never had an orgasm as they were as inept at sex as me.
After moving to London, I met my husband when I was 23.
Sex wasn’t always great. I experienced vaginismus, painful contractions of the vagina, before having children.
Thankfully, this disappeared when I gave up my job and moved to New York.
I also had many bouts of thrush, cystitis and urinary tract infections, all of which made me wary about having sex, as they seemed to be sex-related.
Over time, I learnt that scented products are problematic and that hormonal changes cause thrush -but no one ever offered this advice at the time.
We also never used lubricants which would make sex more pleasurable.
For many, sex can be a disappointing experience in their 20s – the good news is it can improve with experience

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For many, sex can be a disappointing experience in their 20s – the good news is it can improve with experience
These days, researching sex and writing about it has been an eye-opener and has made me realise just how lucky I am to have such a good sex life, compared to many people.
It got me thinking about what makes sex so much better for me and my husband now we’re in our late 40s.
While writing about sex has made me more sexually confident, there are various other reasons…
WE HAVE SEX FREQUENTLY
By this I meant three to four times a week – but not always.
It can be hard work motivating yourself at times, especially if you are tired or don’t feel in the mood/
But I do find myself getting ratty with everyone if we have a dry spell.
Sex expert Samantha Evans was plagued with weight issues and physical problems that stopped her enjoying sex in her 20s but now says it’s better than ever in her 40s

Sex expert Samantha Evans was plagued with weight issues and physical problems that stopped her enjoying sex in her 20s but now says it’s better than ever in her 40s
We haven’t always had sex this frequently but by making an effort, I often find that the best sex happens when I’m not really in the mood.
You don’t even have to have coital sex, just try foreplay or cuddling and kissing.
Sex toys are fun and there are great sex toys for men too.
Sometimes coital sex isn’t possible but you can still enjoy amazing orgasms in other ways.
SEX IS GOOD FOR US

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Having sex makes me feel good.
The benefits of having sex are huge, from releasing feel good endorphins, to reducing stress, making you sleep better and giving you glowing skin, in addition to warding off sexual dysfunction problems.
Having sex releases feel good endorphins to reduce stress and give you a glowing complexion, she says

Having sex releases feel good endorphins to reduce stress and give you a glowing complexion, she says
Owning my company has made me aware of just how many problems people experience when it comes to sex.
So I now write health and pleasure articles, offering practical advice and tips about how to enjoy sexual intimacy whoever you are and whatever your, sexual problem, illness or disease.
I KNOW WHAT I LIKE AND WHAT MY HUSBAND LIKES IN BED Now I’m in my late 40s, I know what I’m doing when it comes to sex.
I know what I like, what turns me off and how to bring pleasure to myself and my husband.
Knowing what brings pleasure to yourself and partner is key to a good sex life, says sex expert Mrs Evans
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Knowing what brings pleasure to yourself and partner is key to a good sex life, says sex expert Mrs Evans
Being together for over 24 years and married for 17 of them, we have had great sex in the past but are having even better sex now because we talk about it and show each other what we want, need and enjoy.
Even now, it still surprises us when we discover that we both have the same thoughts about the same sexual thing or fantasy.
I KNOW HOW TO LET GO
Now I’m older, I find it easier to let go and enjoy sex, rather than filling my head with all the stuff I have to do or replaying situations and conversations from the day.
Sometimes it can be hard to switch off the chatter in your head.
But I give myself a shake and start concentrating on the pleasurable sensations running through my body, not if I’ve done the packed lunches for my children, who are really old enough to do their own.
Finding your inner dominatrix can boost both you and your partner’s sex life
Finding your inner dominatrix can boost both you and your partner’s sex life
I’VE FOUND MY INNER DOMINATRIX
My husband loves this and so do I. It doesn’t happen every time but quite often, but there is something very sexy about dominating your man.
Too many women just lie there and expect their man to do all the work, then complain when it isn’t any good.
I used to lie there and just let him do all the work but now I take control, I find I have amazing blended orgasms.
I get the best clitoral stimulation when on top and can control the pace at which I go – so either speed up my sexual pleasure or prolong it.
WE TALK ABOUT SEX

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Obviously our business is sex-related, but we also talk about what we like, what feels good, what we’d like to try and how it might make us feel.
Writing about sex has made it feel better and I have discovered new techniques and ideas through my research which has increased both our sexual pleasure and fun.
Many couples don’t talk about sex at all.
Lying there in silence isn’t going to work.
Men need guidance, and would much rather touch you in ways that will bring you pleasure and vice versa.
I DON’T PUT UP WITH RUBBISH SEX ANY MORE
As mentioned above, I put up with rubbish sex in my 20’s because I didn’t know any better.
I experienced vaginismus (vaginal tightness) during my late 20’s but wouldn’t tell my partner for fear of letting him down sexually.
When he found out he was saddened that he had caused me pain and I had put up with it so he could enjoy sexual pleasure.
Pretending to enjoy things during sex when you don’t means he is likely to continue doing it that way, she says

Pretending to enjoy things during sex when you don’t means he is likely to continue doing it that way, she says
Now, if it feels uncomfortable, I tell him and we stop.
But many women and men endure bad sex to placate their partners.
Pretending you enjoy what they are doing when you are busy making a shopping list in your head means they think you’re enjoying it and they will continue doing it in that way.
Sex should never feel painful or uncomfortable and you should not endure sex in this way.
It could also indicate that something is wrong.
I USE LUBE
I never used sexual lubricant in my 20s as it was something old women used.
As a former nurse, I used KY jelly on the hospital wards for various procedures, such as examinations.
I was vaguely aware that certain high street shops sold flavoured lubes and products which made you tingle but never considered them for my sex play.
Mrs Evans says she has ‘never looked back’ after using water-based lubricant Yes
Mrs Evans says she has ‘never looked back’ after using water-based lubricant Yes
Having had problems with thrush, cystitis and vaginal irritation, I didn’t realise that lubricants and spermicidal gels can cause such problems, having never been offered any advice by my GP.
Having discovered YES organic lubricants 7 years ago, we have never looked back. YES has been one of the best finds for our sex life and I won’t have sex without it.
It is the best lubricant I have ever tried, we just wished we’d found it after having our children.
But just mentioning the word lubricant conjures up a sad picture of a menopausal woman, yet sex feels so much better when you use lubes, whatever your age.

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There is an assumption in younger men and women that women should just be ready for sex, even though hormonal changes, stress, illness and medication can all affect vaginal secretions every month.
Dry sex is not pleasant and can be painful, leading to tiny cuts in the vaginal wall which may get infected.
Using a good lubricant nourishes the tissues of the vaginal walls, making them feel moisturised and more pliable.
SEX TOYS MAKE A HUGE DIFFERENCE
Owning a sex toy company allows me to experiment with new sex toys to find one perfect for my needs.
Having said that, my husband and I use a variety of sex toys that offer different sexual sensations so I don’t think just one will ever do.
Selling well made, skin-safe products also makes me realise that jelly, rubber or latex sex toys are bad news and should be avoided at all costs, which is why we don’t sell them.
Sex toys sales are increasing as they become acceptable within society and people realise the benefits of using a sex toy for both their sexual pleasure and sexual health.
Surprisingly, many younger people don’t use sex toys within their relationships to avoid upsetting their partner, yet sex toys used during sexual intercourse can increase your sexual pleasure, not diminish it.
Many women believe that sex toys are a threat to a relationship but studies have shown that most men are happy for their partners to use them

Many women believe that sex toys are a threat to a relationship but studies have shown that most men are happy for their partners to use them
Sex dungeons and role-play, oh my! Couples share fantasies

Studies show that 75 per cent of women only orgasm clitorally during sex – a fact many women and men fail to understand – but there are a number of gadgets out there you can both enjoy.
Many women also believe sex toys are a threat to a relationship, but studies have shown that most men are happy for their partners to use them.
Some women like using a sex toy, such as a vibrator, but think their partner is strange if he wants to use one, yet there are many great sex toys for men which can increase sexual pleasure for you both.
Toys can never replace the real thing – but they can help you enjoy sexual pleasure if you don’t have a man around.
Many older women buy a vibrator when their partner has died or their relationship has broken up.
This is because they miss sexual pleasure and still want to experience it – or if their partner has erectile dysfunction and is unable to have penetrative sex.

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SO DOES MAKING NOISE…
Making sounds of pleasure will encourage your partner to continue what they’re doing.
Most men find responsiveness a greater turn on than the way you look.
Encouraging your partner turns you both on as they are doing something that pleasures you and you get to enjoy it.
This works both ways.
BEING MORE CONFIDENT HELPS TOO
I’ve had three children and still blame my tummy on our youngest child who is 11.
However I have good boobs, which my man loves.
Lying there sucking in your tummy means you’re not concentrating on the sex and what’s happening to your body.
Most men are less interested in how their partner looks than they are and enjoy confidences, says Mrs Evans

Most men are less interested in how their partner looks than they are and enjoy confidences, says Mrs Evans
Most men don’t give a stuff about how you look, they love confidence.
Too much emphasis is put on being perfect when you partner loves your smile, the dimple on your chin, your luscious buttocks or come to bed eyes.
I have had weight issues in the past, like many women, but I have now found the right balance of eating healthily, drinking alcohol occasionally and taking regular exercise.
I quite like the way I look now, something I probably wouldn’t have said five years ago.
I feel better when I’ve had sex – even if I’m really tired and just want to sleep.
I hope we will continue to have fantastic sex until we die.
That’s because I know there are ways in which we can keep our sexual intimacy alive into our twilight years even if we are too arthritic to make love.