8 Sex Trends You Might Not Know About, But Definitely Should Explore

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Who doesn’t love a little adrenaline? We pay to ride roller coasters and get addicted to tattoos, so it makes sense that we’d want a little excitement in our sex lives. According to a study done by LELO, compared to 2012, 2014 was a big year for risky sex. In 2012, their survey reported that 27 percent of women had sex outdoors, while 35 percent tried it in 2014. Only 10 percent of women in 2012 participated in a threesome, compared to the 20 percent who gave it a go just two years later. As for sex tapes, in 2012, only 28 percent had filmed one, while 2014 saw a jump to 52 percent! Having the confidence to try something new is seriously cool — and your partner probably agrees. As long as all parties feel safe and comfortable, a little risk can go a long way.

8 Sex Trends You Might Not Know About, But Definitely Should Explore

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2nd Trend
It’s a bird … a plane … no, it’s a sex toy for everyone! Amazingly progressive sex toys are all the rage (freaking finally), and toys that accommodate genders of all kinds are at the forefront. The Picobong Transformer acts as a clitoral massager, G-spot stimulator, cock ring, prostate massager, and various other sex toys — all in one! I don’t know about you, but I’ve never seen an image of such perfection. Even if it looks a little like an alien’s finger, it’s a surefire way make everyone’s orgasm on point.
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8 Sex Trends You Might Not Know About, But Definitely Should Explore

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The 1st Trend
When you search #FreeTheNipple on Instagram, the content generally “isn’t available,” and that’s because women’s nipples still aren’t entirely free. From laws limiting reproductive rights to some states having no penalties for revenge porn, there are still many hurdles to overcome on behalf of women’s rights — in particular, their rights in regard to their bodies. However, one way women have been taking ownership over their bodies has been through social media. It has become more commonplace for women to post sexy, even nude, photos on their social media accounts, just to share with the world how fabulous they are. With celebrities posting cheeky topless pics left and right, and the public following suit (especially on Twitter!), we’re embracing the female form in a very open way. One in five American adults has received a nude photo in their life, and in the name of being #bodyposi, that can be considered an empowering thing — because having the confidence to send one is awesome

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When you search #FreeTheNipple on Instagram, the content generally “isn’t available,” and that’s because women’s nipples still aren’t entirely free. From laws limiting reproductive rights to some states having no penalties for revenge porn, there are still many hurdles to overcome on behalf of women’s rights — in particular, their rights in regard to their bodies. However, one way women have been taking ownership over their bodies has been through social media. It has become more commonplace for women to post sexy, even nude, photos on their social media accounts, just to share with the world how fabulous they are. With celebrities posting cheeky topless pics left and right, and the public following suit (especially on Twitter!), we’re embracing the female form in a very open way. One in five American adults has received a nude photo in their life, and in the name of being #bodyposi, that can be considered an empowering thing — because having the confidence to send one is awesom
chrissyteigenHAIR @jrugg8

7 forgotten places where your partner should be touching you

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landscape-1476438815-places-your-partner-should-be-touching-you-1476155446The clit is a wonderful thing: More of an iceberg than a button, it’s only partially visible, and it packs the same number of sensory nerve endings as the penis into an organ just one-tenth the size. You are probably aware that the nipple is also an erogenous zone for both men and women — cool, awesome, wow. But now let’s talk about those less-obvious spots your partner (or you) should be touching but may be neglecting, with insight from sex therapist Vanessa Marin, who teaches the online orgasm course Finishing School. Here are the areas she thinks you should lavish a little extra attention on tonight.

1. The underside of your butt. The place where your thigh turns into your butt is for more than showing off under the hem of those denim booty shorts you thought were so hot circa 2007: Marin says it’s a nerve-rich area, too, and stimulating it can make for sexy foreplay. Instead of having your partner dive straight for your clit and give you oral, for example, you can have them “trace one finger along it, or [try] light kisses or licks” and then work their way to vulva territory, Marin suggests.

2. The underboob. Cleavage is the star of many an outfit, and nipples are endlessly pinched, licked, and sucked, but the underboob goes all but unnoticed. It doesn’t have to be this way. “A single finger here can feel amazing,” Marin says. You can also have your partner lick this area with a long stroke or in a circular motion. The skin here is super sensitive and receptive to stimulation, and what’s more, it’s so close to two tried-and-true classic erogenous zones — your nipples — that they may perk up

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3. The backs of your knees. Another overlooked and nerve-rich area, the backs of your knees might also benefit from some touching, kissing, or licking — or even stimulation from a vibrator if you’re really feeling it, as sex therapist Ava Cadell, PhD has previously suggested. To up the stakes, have your partner drag a tiny pinwheel designed for sensation play, an ice cube, or a tickler from the back of your knee up your body to your more “traditional” erogenous zones. The slower they go, the more anticipation will build.

4. The inner elbows. Marin recommends “light kisses and strokes” on the thin skin here. This might feel divine to some, so-so to others, and ticklish to a few, but it’s worth finding out which camp you’re in.

5. The labia. Yes, your labia are hard to miss, but they’re still often ignored: “You wouldn’t think of labia as being overlooked,” Marin says, “but so many people tend to go straight for the clitoris.” Before you do that, though, try teasing the labia to increase excitement. Tell your partner to “slowly slide their finger from top to bottom, without parting the lips,” Marin suggests, then “keep going up and down, gradually increasing your pressure until they start to feel their finger slip inside.”
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6. The anus. “More and more people are opening up to the joys of anal play,” Marin says, “but I’d say it’s still a pretty overlooked spot.” The key with anal play is to start slow: There are so many ways to enjoy this area other than penetrative sex. Check out the magical world of butt plugs (there’s a size and style for every body), experiment with fingers and mouths, and don’t forget the lube. “A great way to start is to have your partner apply a tiny bit of pressure to the outside of your anus with one lubed-up finger, as they’re going down on you or fingering you,” Marin says.

7. The back of your neck. This is an especially sexy spot, and you don’t have to be undressed for your partner to access it. “People pay a good amount of attention to the front and sides of the neck, but tend to forget about the back,” Marin says. “Flip over onto your belly, pull your hair up, and ask your partner to kiss along your hairline.” Then, they can work their way down to the underside of your butt and the backs of your knees — you’re making up for all the time you forgot how good those spots could feel.

Follow Hayley on Twitter. From Cosmo US.

A Beginner’s Guide to Loving Lubricant

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beginers guide to lubricants

A Beginner’s Guide to Loving Lubricant
BY
EMILY MORSE
SEPTEMBER 11, 2016 6:00 PM
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PHOTO: STOCKSY
Hi Emily,

I love you and your show, and I’ve had a great time testing out your tips for spicing things up with my boyfriend. Per your recommendation, we have recently been trying to work lube into our sexual routine, but stopped because I was really not enjoying it. It made a huge mess and got everywhere during foreplay, and I was very aware of it WHILE we were having sex. I also didn’t like the way it felt afterward—especially if we had sex during the day (because I would have to go somewhere after, and I would have lube all around my vagina).

I know you’re a huge fan of lube, and I want to love it. But I feel like there’s something I must be missing, because so far, I’m not getting the appeal. Were we just using too much? Is there another lube you can suggest that might be better?

Thank you! Sheridan, age 22

Dear Sheridan,

I get it. I’ve been there. You get all excited to try something new, and the results are less than thrilling, so you start to question whether it’s really for you. Everyone else loves it, shouldn’t you? But before you lose the lube love completely, let’s try to troubleshoot so you can get the most out of what I think is an essential element to great sex.

The first thing we should probably look at is the type of lubricant you were using. There are a lot of options out there with different ingredients and textures, as well as varying qualities and price points. And yes: There are bad lubricants out there. Before you pick a lube out of the bargain bin at a drug store, it’s important to know what you’re taking home and slathering on your lady parts. The wrong lube can come with a host of problems that can really spoil an otherwise hot hookup.

So what separates the good stuff from the bad (besides the price tag?) To start, a low-quality lube is often sticky and leaves a residue behind. They can have perfumes or dyes that cause infections, mess up your vaginal pH balance and, as you noticed, may feel unnatural during sex.

On the other hand, a good lube is made to match and compliment your natural lubrication, rather than overpower or replace it. It should feel slippery or silky, depending on the type, but NEVER tacky. And the true test of a great lubricant is that you really can’t tell it’s there at all—it enhances, but never distracts from, the sex at hand.

So let’s talk the best lube for you. If you’re new to lubricants, definitely start with a water-based formula. You will find that this type is lightweight, doesn’t get sticky, washes away easily and most closely matches your natural lubrication. Water-based lubricant may not last as long as other formulas, but it won’t stain your sheets or leave a big ol’ mess.

If slippery is more your speed, you might want to try out a silicone lube. Silicone-based formulas are thicker, last longer, and are great for water play—but be aware that these are not as safe to use with other products. While they do work with (most) latex condoms, be careful when using them with your favorite silicone sex toys (the silicone breaks down the toy’s materials and can cause serious damage).

Lately, social media has been touting the benefits of natural lubricants like coconut oil. This trend may seem like a “healthy” alternative to silicone products because they’re organic and made from natural ingredients, but oil-based lubricants don’t work for everyone. The natural sugars can disrupt your vaginal pH-balance, sometimes leading to irritation, and they are definitely not latex- or sex toy-safe.

My favorite option for a water-based lubricant is JO Naturalove Organic lubricant. It has a smooth, long-lasting glide that isn’t overpowering or distracting during sex. It’s safe to use with toys and condoms and, as a bonus, contains chamomile, which actually soothes the vagina instead of causing irritation.

The second issue that likely contributed to your negative experience is using too much—hence your hyperawareness of it during sex. You want to start with a dime-size amount of lube, then add more as needed.

A quick note with regards to postplay cleanup: Even if it’s unpleasant or inconvenient, it’s important to clean the vagina after sex—no matter what. The microbiota of the vagina is very delicate and any lingering fluids can disrupt it, causing itchiness, discomfort, and infections.

The bottom line: don’t give up! The only real way to figure out what type of lube and how much to use is experimentation. You’ll know you have found the right one because it makes everything better. (I promise!)

You won’t become an expert on your first dip into the lube pool, so keep experimenting!

Xxx Emily

Emily Morse is a Doctor of Human Sexuality and host of the iTunes Top-Rated podcast Sex with Emily. As an expert, author, and star of television and radio programs, she has inspired millions of listeners and followers to make sex a priority, enhance communication, and strengthen their relationships. To learn more or to subscribe to her podcast, visit sexwithemily.com.

How to Be Naughty and Sexy – Spice Up Your Love Life

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44 Amazing Sex Positions Every Married Couple Should Try To Spice Up Their Sex Life
Like many aspects of marriage, sex plays an integral part in the relationship. It goes beyond physical actions and acts as a form of communication and connection. An unhappy sex life can quickly lead to an unhappy marriage. One of the easiest and most pleasurable ways to keep your sex life active, exciting, and – most importantly – spicy is to keep things new. This can be done through various forms of foreplay, open communication about likes and dislikes, and a willingness to explore new positions. To help you explore your sex life and keep things spicy in (and out!) of the bedroom, this book offers a guide to 44 sexual positions ranging from the extremely intimate to adventurous and athletic.
Here is a list of types of positions you’ll learn in the book:
Intimacy Positions: For Those Needing to Rekindle Their Fire
Lying Down Positions: Finding New Ways to Make Horizontal Fun Memorable
Sitting and Kneeling Positions: You Don’t Have to Lie Down and Take It
Standing Positions: Who Said Sex Stays in the Bedroom?
Adventurous and Athletic Positions: For Those in Need of a Challenge
Your sex life may be suffering for a number of reasons – lack of intimacy, lack of variety, etc. – or it may be bountiful and just in need of a few ideas to jumpstart the bedroom adventures. Whatever the reason, these tips should offer the spice needed to kick start your love life to a whole new level.

Is forgiving a cheating partner a sign of weakness? Tracey Cox reveals when to walk and when to work on your relationship

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Tess Daly’s husband was linked to another woman for the second time
The presenter has put on a brave face, but should we admire or pity her?
Relationship expert Tracey Cox gives you her take on when to forgive
By TRACEY COX FOR MAILONLINE

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As Tess Daly puts on a brave face during another alleged sex text scandal involving husband Vernon Kay, public opinion divides between those who admire her for ‘standing by her man’ and those who think she should dump the b*****d quick smart.
Is forgiving a cheating partner a sign of weakness or strength?
After all, both leaving someone you love and staying with someone you love who has hurt you are both difficult.
Is forgiving a cheating partner a sign of weakness or strength? Relationship expert Tracey Cox gives you her take on when to forgive infidelity and when to let the relationship go

Is forgiving a cheating partner a sign of weakness or strength? Relationship expert Tracey Cox gives you her take on when to forgive infidelity and when to let the relationship go
Here’s my take.
IT’S (PROBABLY) JUSTIFIED LOYALTY IF:
This is a first
The best predictor of future behaviour is relevant past behaviour.
If you’ve been together for years and you have no doubts your partner has always been faithful up until now, it’s worth hanging around.
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How soon into the relationship it happens is also highly relevant. The earlier the infidelity, the less chance the couple have of making it.
Giving them another chance feels like the right thing to do.
Do you deserve better? Do your kids deserve better?
If your honest answer is, ‘My partner is worthy of us, he/she just made a horrible mistake’ your loyalty is probably deserved.
You can understand how and why it happened
Was the relationship going through a rough patch? Was your partner struggling with something like the death of a parent or another traumatic event?
If you were put in their situation, would you perhaps have done the same thing under the same circumstances?
I’m not suggesting cheating is ever justified – it isn’t – but it does help if you can at least understand how it happened and their explanation of why rings true?
Tracey Cox advises on how to move on infidelity

Tracey Cox advises on how to move on infidelity
You suspected something wasn’t quite right
You’re far more likely to forgive an affair if you were suspicious and your instincts told you something was going on.
The more confident you are that you would spot the signs if it happened again, the more likely you are to trust again.
This behaviour is uncharacteristic
If up until now (and in other areas of their life) they are trustworthy and reliable, it’s a good sign.
If you still think they’re a nice person and have your best interest at heart, giving it another chance is sensible.
Your friends and family think staying is the right thing to do
If your partner is well liked and people who know both of you are shocked by what’s happened and supportive in your decision to work through it, it’s a very good sign you’ve made the right choice stay.
They are clearly sorry about what they’ve done and feeling just as bad as you are about it all
They need to be obviously remorseful and prepared to do pretty much anything to make it up to you.
It’s the best thing for the children
Just make sure it is.
Staying together ‘no matter what’ for the kids isn’t always the best solution.
Growing up with parents who are locked in a toxic, destructive relationship is not a pleasant environment in which to start life.
Children are sponges: they watch and see far more than you realise and their future relationships are strongly influenced by how they see their parents relating.
Having two happy parents who live separately is preferable to two parents who live together but clearly can’t stand each other.
They’re willing to get counselling
I’d strongly recommend any couple battling the aftermath of a messy, soul-destroying infidelity (and aren’t they all?) to visit a therapist together, even if it’s just for a few sessions.
Being able to battle it out in a safe environment with someone unbiased who can guide you through it, is critical to how quickly and how well you get through this.
If your partner refuses to even consider the idea, it’s often because they’re worried they’ll slip up about other infidelities you don’t know about.
Or they simply don’t care if you stay together or split.
Staying together ‘no matter what’ for the kids isn’t always the best solution
You’re strong enough to fend off the criticism
Lots of people who will think your decision to stay condones cheating and sends a bad example to others.
It’s totally dependent on your individual situation but, even so, be prepared to either defend yourself or make it clear it’s no-one else’s business.
You’re convinced it’s over or won’t happen again
This seems obvious but you’d be surprised at the amount of people who give their partner another chance without really knowing they’ve stopped contact with the person they cheated with.
Or continue to let them associate with the same friends or colleagues who led them by the hand into the path of temptation and encouraged it.
It hurts but you’re confident you can eventually move past it
Do you secretly think forgiving them means ‘they’ve got away with it’?
If you intend to make them pay for what they’ve done every single day you’re together, what is the point?
You’re willing to learn from it
Therapists say one of the best questions to ask afterward is ‘What did you like about yourself during the affair?’
An affair holds up a vanity mirror, the kind with all the little bulbs around it. It gives you a rosy glow to the way you see yourself.
A marriage or long-term relationship is more like a make-up mirror that magnifies every little flaw.
Relationships do survive infidelity – especially if it acts as a wake up call and forces you to address long-standing issues you’ve both been ignoring.
IT’S UTTER MADNESS IF:
Pretty much every partner you’ve had, has cheated on you
If all your partners cheat, you need therapy not yet another partner who treats you badly.
One partner cheating is a mistake, choosing partners who are always unfaithful is a relationship pattern that means (at best) you have low self-esteem or (at worst) are battling more serious issues.
Get help (itsgoodtotalk.org.uk or relate.org.uk)
They have a history of cheating with other partners
If they’ve cheated on every person they’ve been out with – and nothing’s changed in their life to make them rethink their behaviour, it’s pretty much guaranteed they’ll do the same to you.
This isn’t the first time they’ve cheated on you
Spur-of-the-moment no-strings-sex may represent nothing more than opportunism, fuelled by one too many drinks.
But it still breaks the trust bond and, if discovered, has the power to destroy a 20-year relationship in one second flat.
Infidelity is incredibly painful to recover from.
If you have forgiven your partner before and endured the long, painful process of learning to trust them again, them cheating a second (third, fourth) time sends a clear signal: your feelings aren’t that important to me.
It doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t love you if they cheat but it does mean they don’t respect you and have a different value system.
Tracey Cox shares her thoughts on forgiving a cheating partner

Tracey warns: ‘If all your partners cheat, you need therapy not yet another partner who treats you badly’

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Tracey warns: ‘If all your partners cheat, you need therapy not yet another partner who treats you badly’
They refuse to admit to an infidelity when there’s irrefutable proof
An unsupported accusation may well be just that: rumours or suspicion.
But if you have solid proof your partner cheated and they’re still lying to you, why would you believe anything else they say?
They don’t have a good reason for doing it
You were getting on well, everything was fine in their life and they can’t even come up with a plausible reason other than ‘It just happened’ or ‘I was drunk’?
You’re staying? Really?
They lie about other things as well – and are convincing
Honesty is the basis of most good relationships and being lied to is often what people find the hardest to come to grips with after an infidelity.
‘I can understand she wanted novelty sexually and have made peace with that, ‘ said one man whose wife had a three-month-affair.
‘But I can’t forgive that she blatantly and consistently lied to my face about where she was and who she was with. She was so believable, how can I ever trust her again?’
If you honestly don’t think you’d know if your partner did it to you again, why would you stay?
You struggle with trust issues or jealousy
Everyone struggles after finding out someone they trusted has done the dirty on them.
But if you are prone to jealousy or have real issues trusting (you’ve been burned before, parents had an affair) it’s going to be doubly difficult for you and it’s unlikely the trust bond can be repaired.
Absolutely no-one supports your decision to give them another chance.
If there’s even a tiny amount of logic to you forgiving, you’d have at least one person on your side.
See reason – walk.
For more of Tracey’s views, products and books on sex and relationships, visit traceycox.com
To find a good therapist visit (itsgoodtotalk.org.uk or relate.org.uk